Rosario Dawson’s cleavage, how Government should be, leads sexy guest list at White House dinner.

98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel

Oh my, oh my, it’s just another manic Monday, as the Bengals would sing. Stressful, depressing, the girl in the cube next to me playing some Lady GaGa song while I am trying to creep around on the Internet. Ok, it’s really none of that to be honest. This Monday is just like any other day, I am creeping around online looking for amazing pictures of sexy celebrity girls.

And up to the plate…Rosario Dawson. Yes, Rosario Dawson of Sin City and Eagle Eye fame, took her talents to Washington D.C. for the 98th Annual White House Correspondents/ Association Dinner.

Any by her talents, I mean her incredibly, amazing, vivacious and bi-partisan cleavage. Rosario Dawson’s boobs, clearly capable of mending any divide and erecting policy. And by policy, I mean…. I assume you got that.

The 98th Annual White House Correspondents’s Assocation dinner actually managed something I thought would be impossible. It carried with it a guest list longer with hotties than the actual name of the dinner. I tagged all the ones we got, but here are a few notes from the creeper vault.

Sofia Vergara showed up looking totally elegant, like the girl you take home to mom and tell her you are totally hooking up with and post on Facebook every 5 minutes that you are tapping that.

Anna Paquin of True Blood, Kate Hudson of being a famous woman’s daughter, Zooey Deschanel of lame iPad commercial fame… all  also there. Enjoy the pictures and tell us what you think. And tell the girl in the cube next to you to cut that s@#t off….

98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, rosario dawson, cleavage, boobs, Irina Shayk, reese witherspoon, Claire Danes, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Paquin, Kate Hudson, Sofia Vergara, Malin Akerman, Zooey Deschanel

Kate Upton, tight dress, pre-party, oh my.

98th Annual White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, kate upton, tight dress,

Kate Upton attended the 98th Annual White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner (more on that in the next post where you will get all the sultry sexy cleavage fest shots in one big breakfast bowl). Kate also attended the pre-party. Because no party is a real party without a pre-party and no pre-party is complete without hot and sexy girls, or just one Kate Upton in a tight dress. That first part sounded like rap lyrics. Maybe I should start rapping instead of creepy blogging and manufacturing Internet sexiness?

Nah, I like this too much. I mean, that’s my job, finding Kate Upton in a sexy dress.

One thing worth noting in the pictures are the people watching Kate as she arrives. It’s like they are witnessing the resurrection of Jesus. Sexy Jesus. Kate Upton, angel: literally and figuratively.

Ok, let’s get on with today. The next post is going to be uber sexy amazing. Like I can hardly restraint my loins.

Now I feel gross for saying that.

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Jordan Carver’s boobs busting out of swimsuit poolside.

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Some of you might be wondering why I am not at church right now and why I’m instead working. Well, the truth of the matter, if you are interested, is that I am working…but it’s for God. I am doing the Lord’s work. That’s right, while some people are listening to sermons, I am finding the hallelujah all by me-self and pushing out angelic pictures on the web so that when people get finished donating to the offering basket they have an Internet full of Holy Boobs.

So there. And on to the worship.

Jordan Carver is doing a photoshoot to promote her new show, the real housewives of tit city. Not really, but she’s popping bottles poolside and wearing a rubber swimsuit while a professional photographer gets the digs. Ok, maybe not professional, but more like the creepy neighbor kid that just got a new Sony camera at Best Buy. And yes, that swimsuit has to be made of rubber, what other material would hold that huge rack of boobs? A material that is used to make tires for semi-trucks, that’s what material. It just makes sense. Jordan’s boobs could literally float the titanic.

I hope you enjoy these amazing Jordan Carver boob pictures. Because that’s what they were meant for. Pleasure. Sin.

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Jodie Gasson working towards Bass Masters.

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Guys in the South, please don’t all go crazy at once when you look at these pictures. It may not be safe for your heart. Erections lasting more than 3 days should be labeled unhealthy and awesome.

Meet Jodie Gasson. She’s a UK model that’s been in magazines like Maxim and Fast Car. Of course she has been in a car magazine, I mean, how could that not make total sense? She has the body built to be laying over a cherry red Corvette with a white backdrop and she’s holding on to a bottle of Petrol. Instead we have her here fishing. The minnows should be in total fear.

But welcome to her new body of work: fishing. That’s right, Jodie Gason, who you probably had no idea existed until 2 seconds ago (or 5 minutes ago for some of you really slow readers), is now into fishing, or at least that’s what the photographer would want to have you think. Well, I am taking the bait.

Jodie is 23 years old. Here is her Model Mayhem profile. Yes, that’s how I roll. I do scholarly Internet discovery on hot and sexy girls while nude. Them, being nude. Ok, I really meant myself. I am actually nude right now, I admit it. Whatever, don’t hate. That’s just how I roll.

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Hilary Duff is mother of sleeping baby. World shutters at ground breaking news.

hillary duff, pregnant, mother, people magazine, hilary duff

I know, you woke up this morning seeking the news of the world. An interesting and compelling human insight story. A story that would put you on the precipice of complete mind wandering intrigue.

Well, this is not that story. So step back for a few moments from the precipice.

Hilary Duff did quite possibly the most boring interview with People Magazine about her new baby, Luca. If she’d have talked about how Lucas came out of her vagina while in a hospital, this interview would have been 100 times more compelling.

Oh man. Ok, first off, lets examine the title of this puppy, “Hillary Duff: Motherhood’s ‘Biggest shock’ is no sleep.”

I fear greatly the day that Hillary discovers that China is not just some Ewok village that produces cool socks for the world. How in the heck is one shocked by a baby keeping you up at night? Her entire life must have been thrilling, “mommy guess what I saw a video and school today and we put a man on the moon!”

via People:
“The first week I was like, ‘I’m doing this, I’m good. I can not sleep, I can do this.’ I don’t know where you get that energy from,” Duff, 24, tells PEOPLE. “Then it hits you — the fatigue.”… But two weeks later the late-night feedings turned a corner and Luca has been nothing short of a star sleeper, the proud mama raves.

It must be a struggle when your nanny gives you a daily report on how this kid is progressing. Imagine having to shuffle your schedule around just to make time to meet with her? But it’s nice to hear that the baby is a great sleeper, which I interpret as her having excellent walls and a nanny that doesn’t wear loud shoes in the home.

and

“So many people were like, ‘Take naps when your baby naps,’” she recalls. “So I tried and it really helped a lot. I thought when he was napping that was the time I could do all the things I needed to do. It’s a fine balance.”

What things did you possibly need to do? Can’t the stylist come to your home? I am sure you can send your personal shopper to The Grove, everything will be fine.

I swear, some of these celebs think that when they give birth it’s like totally different experience from the rest of us. Now I can’t give birth, because I am a man. So in a way she is right, but not really.

Here are some pictures of Hilary Duff pregnant and struggling with thousands of dollars in shopping good while in Beverly Hills. Compelling, I know.

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Victoria’s Secret is that Miranda Kerr is about to make your weekend.

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Are you hungover this morning? Well before you have that bloody mary and paradise pancakes from iHop, I have brought to you a Victoria’s Secret lingerie model shoot with Miranda Kerr. Yes, Minranda Kerr, the paradise within your pancakes. The wings beneath your libido. The endless lame metaphors that I will stop immediately.

Miranda is a buddhist who is known to chant every morning and night. I somehow think this is total BS because no way would she do something like that and ruin my image of her. Unless she practices this Buddhism naked, which would then make up considerable ground. She also says coconut oil is the key to her incredible looks.

One second, I need to go online and mass order coconut oil. I am going to start sneaking this stuff into the whoppers of some of the girls that I date and see if it helps any.

I hope Miranda Kerr in lingerie and half naked makes your Saturday even better.

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Lindsay Lohan and Kim Kardashian to attend White House dinner.

lindsay lohan, kim kardashian, white house, greta van susteren, john coale,

And in other news, Hitler’s hologram has been invited to speak at the Museum of Tolerance this weekend in Los Angeles. Ok, maybe not, but did you notice how it beheld the same fury of total shock and disgust? Apparently this is all on Gret Van Sustren. Shocker.

via Gawker:
Kardashian was invited by the news network; Greta Van Susteren and her husband John Coale invited Lohan.
Kardashian is no stranger to the gala, having attended in 2010 with Van Susteren. Her plus-one for the evening will be momager Kris Jenner. Lohan’s publicist told WaPo’s The Reliable Source that his client will be bringing along her defense attorney Shawn Holley.

Because of this ridiculousness, Greta Van Sustren is somehow pulling the impractical and becoming more annoying than her dinner guest Kim Kardashian and Lindsay Lohan. Why? Because she somehow is pompous enough to think that inviting these two will make her appear to be above the laws of not looking like an idiot. This is kinda like when you see some douchebag on the street wearing an Affliction shirt and you are all like “idiot douchebag,” but then you see that same shirt on say a big UFC fighter like Chuck Liddel and you are all like “he is bad a#$.”

Kardashian and Lohan are the bad Affliction shirt that are still bad when worn by Van Sustren and her stupid husband John Coale. I can only assume this is for some show she is doing which makes it even more pathetic. Unless she thinks she is being savvy and leaving the current administration a political message. You know, like leaving a bag of poo on fire on the front door step for Obama to come out and smash with his foot. But if that’s the case, then leave a bag of poo on fire on the doorstep. Don’t make Lohan and Kardashian your poo guest. Lohan can’t even be on time for the show Glee, how do you expect her to make a White House dinner on time?

In honor of this Government day of mourning, I leave you with some pictures of Kim Kardashian in tight business casual pants. But only because I have a heart.

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Michelle Hunziker. Bikini. Miami. Really you need more? Just click….

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Sigh, really, what else do you need to know here?

Oh wait, maybe I should have led with The Swiss Family Robinson missing their hot MILF member. Now Found.

My bad.

An oncoming MILF with a hot body laying out in Miami. I say oncoming because she is still early 30s and I am not sold that’s complete MILF status as it seems unfair to the other MILFs competing for queen body title. I mean, look at Michelle Hunzinker in her gold laden bikini laying out in tropical Miami. This story has less holes in it than swiss cheese, its literally perfect. Sexy foreign girl bikini Miami bad-Pamela-Anderson-tattoo. Its all the components that win journalist like me Pulitzers.

Now that you are just rotting away in your cubicle waiting for 5:00 to roll around so you can hit the happy hour and get some $1.50 Coronas and get so messy that you slobber on some random girl’s friends taco platter, you can now peruse a swiss model’s bikini pictures. That’s a dignified way to spend your crappy work hours. And that’s all due to my fantastic journalistic skills. You see how that works?

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Minka Kelly’s cleavage visits prestigious university in nation’s capital

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Minka Kelly visited Washington DC’s George Washington University for the Millennium Challenge Corporation Forum, where she spoke to an audience who reportedly couldn’t focus on anything but her incredible cleavage. In the same way Minka’s boobs bring recognition to those suffering from poverty, they ironically are really freaking distracting from the issue at the same time. It is Thursday, what could be better than this post? Well I guess there are things that could be better but whatever.

The former Charlie’s Angel star (yes, I know, show sucked but I like saying it anyways) is trying to stay “abreast” the topic of poverty by attending events like this. Because sharing is caring. Sharing big incredible racks like Minka’s, that is.

By the way, Minka is 31 and still has some gas left in the tank / breast. Who would have thought the daughter of an Aersosmith guitarist and a stripper would flourish so well? Heck, who would have even thought she’d be even halfway normal? Basically Minka Kelly’s cleavage is the result of a rock star meeting a stripper. Awesome.

I hope you enjoy the pictures of Minka Kelly’s summer dress breast shots. Or enjoy the guy in the bad suit with the creepy mustache. It’s not my place to tell you how to live your lives homies.

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Beyonce connects pregnancy and her current hotness. Fills world with despair.

beyonce, new york city, pregnant, people

Beyonce is getting back to being the queen of hotness, which she is now crediting to her recently giving birth to a baby with a weird name. I’m not repeating the name here because that will help spread celebrity evil.

Blue Ivy Carter.

Crap, now look what I’ve done!!! Release the celebrity evil!

via People:
I feel more beautiful than I’ve ever felt because I’ve given birth,” says PEOPLE’s 2012 World’s Most Beautiful Woman. “I have never felt so connected, never felt like I had such a purpose on this earth.

This news is very upsetting to me. Someone make damn sure that Megan Fox does not hear this gibberish being muttled about. This is the type of rhetoric that spreads and convinces women that having kids is a good thing to do, almost natural. It’s bad enough that us men have to battle things like evolution without having Beyoncelution coming in and sideswiping us as well.

Listen “all the ladies,” Beyonce is hot because she is super rich and because God loves her more than the rest of you. Plain and simple, folks. Also because JayZ is a rapper. Ok not really sure why that has an effect but I am just so sure it does that I am including it. I don’t want to hear anymore of this crap going around. Beyonce snapped back, sure, but lets not get any silly ideas.

Remember people, celebrities can be different from the rest of us. They live in a world of fantasy and photoshop. Babies make girls ugly. It’s proven.

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