Teen mom decides to take the boob plunge

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Ah, the struggles of being a new teen mom. Having a difficult dating life. Trouble making algebra class because you are in labor. Missing making out at the movies with a football player because you have to sit at home watching Elmo with your baby. And of course, having small breast.

Wait, what?

via E! Online:
She got tired of having small breasts. Jenelle decided on a full ‘C’ cup because she does not want to go too big.

Its always nice to see a teen mom take some initiative and get out there and solve her own problems rather than sitting around and complaining about them. I can only imagine the difficult time one must have when they are trying to be a mother to a little kid, all the while having these average sized breast. The world is such a touch place to bear on the daily.

Here are some pictures of Jenelle Evans in her polo shirt, small breast hidden away as not to offend you viewers.

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Reese Witherspoon is definitely pregnant.

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Reese Witherspoon was seen roaming around Brentwood on her pink phone, probably talking big time Hollywood important business with some high powered agent about things we minions would never really comprehend. That kinda power playa talk is too hardcore for us to fathom. Or she was just like, “yes I’m pregnant.”

via US Weekly:
“Reese is right around 12 weeks,” one source explains, adding that the This Means War star is “not planning to announce it.”
The baby-to-be will join older siblings Ava, 12, and Deacon, 8, Witherspoon’s kids with first husband Ryan Phillippe, from whom she split in 2006 after 7 years of marriage. Pals of Witherspoon and high-powered CAA agent Toth, 41, aren’t shocked by the happy news. “Reese and Jim have been trying to get pregnant,” one pal says.

I think the pictures were pretty much a dead giveaway, not as if we needed the confirmation. With summer coming up, an inability to wear big button down jackets and a growing bundle of Witherspoon love is going to make this a pretty tough hide.

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Lindsay Lohan pays men to have sex with her.

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Lindsay Lohan apparently paid a pornstar to bang her one night, which is awesome on so many levels. So the pornstar goes by the name of VooDoo. Of course he does.

via RadarOnline:
“Ask him [Michael Lohan] if he knows about that night I had with his daughter while he was sleeping upstairs,” Voodoo says. “I’m not joking!”
Not only does Voodoo claim to have had “relations” with Lindsay, but he makes it sound like she paid him.
“Many of these Hollywood celebrities pay me a high price dollar to come and satisfy them. I’m not joking!” he says.
To clarify, host Jim Richards says, “So you’ve been with Lindsay Lohan?”
“I’m saying that,” Voodoo confirms.

I may have to wrap this post up pretty quickly as I am clearing my schedule right now, the launch of my jiggilo playa playa website is imminent. Lots to do, lots to do. I have to get my pricing model and shopping cart ready, as well, the lighting on some of my self pics I took in my bathroom mirror could use some after effects.

On another note, these pictures are from the KoreaTown district in Los Angeles, where the morgue is located. That’s Lindsay doing probation work.

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January Jones carries a baby through an airport.

January Jones, Betty Draper, Mad Men, Xander

This just in: January Jones has had sex with a man. How do I know? Actually, not sure how I know. Oh wait, she is carrying HER baby, Xander, through an airport. The “airport” being the lesser important piece of evidence here. In case you don’t know, January Jones plays sexy housewife and revenge cheater Betty Draper on the hit show, Mad Men, which is set to debut in a 2 hour gig on March 24th. Betty has 3 kids. Betty is a fake character who is married to fake husband, Jon Hamm. So that’s all ok. Betty Draper is the hottest housewife ever if you ask me, even beating out Eva Longoria’s character on Desperate Housewives. Enjoy all the pictures.

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Katy Perry’s boobs at NOBU

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This weekend, NOBU sushi of London announced an update upgrade to their menu called Katy Perry’s Fantastic and Spicy Boobs. They are pictured below leaving the London establishment in full robust form. I don’t have to even try them to tell you that I’d willingly enjoy them. And now that Russell Brand is not peppered all over them, maybe I have a shot at trying them. Ok, how in all LA LA land am I being now? As if my spiel about her boobs being a new delish dish at NOBU, I went even further by conjuring up some silly idea that I have a chance at wrangling in Katy’s boobs. Pure and utter silliness. I have to enjoy them the same way that every other man in this world has to enjoy them: by creeping through these pictures, closing my eyes, and picturing them falling out in some crap hole apartment that I live in. Enjoy all the pictures.

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Lindsay Lohan did party after her probation was set.

lindsay lohan, probation, court, tmz

Surprise, surprise, Lindsay Lohan did party it up after her probation was set. So, all those that assumed she remained hermetic in her place only communicating with nuns whom she funded to take to the streets of LA helping the homeless eat and learn better skills for life, were totally wrong. Check this out from TMZ.

via TMZ:
According to our sources, the latest incident prompted people close to Lindsay to beg her to stop going out at night until her probation is over. We’re told Lindsay agreed and will now only leave her house when she really has to … like for her court ordered community service at the morgue.

So now we can expect she will only leave her house when Voyeur Nightclub is desperately seeking someone to polish off an open bottle of champagne before it goes bad and the club has to take the loss. Because that’s how this girl rolls.

I’d still hit it, so there’s that.

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Topless photos of Lauren Stoner

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Michael Bay’s girlfriend, or chick he bangs, whatever, was seen sunbathing topless in Miami. This is awesome news, because, well, Lauren Stoner is ridiculously hot. You could bounce quarters off her butt, no doubt about it. Actually, her butt is like the explosions Michael Bay creates in all of his movies. Her breast “transform” the way my day starts. Wow, I’m sure lame right now. Call me captain pun. Its tough being so incredibly gifted when it comes to wit, but I do go on in my struggle. Don’t let Monday get you down, enjoy Lauren Stoner’s bare boobs.

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Courtney Stodden does Beach Boys nightmare.

courtney stodden, surfing, bikini

When the beach boys wrote Surfin’ in the USA, I promise you one thing, this is not what they meant. Courtney Stodden did her best to pose for photographers in what appears to be a set up surfer set. I mean, wouldn’t believe that Courtney belongs amongst some of the most athletic and coordinated girls in the world. Oh wait, most everyone that can breath. But hey, I’d hit it, and so would you. Nothing like a married teen shunning the responsibilities of her underage marriage by frolicking on a beach with a surf board. Enjoy the bikini pictures.

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Jennifer Lawrence tries surfing

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Jennifer Lawrence, who plays Katniss Everdeen in Hunger Games, took a shot at learning to surf this weekend. Katniss was an excellent hunter and great at archery, so suffice to say, she’d be pissed if she saw these pictures of Jennifer failing at surfing.

Aside from that, if you love nice rumps, then this is the post for you. Its not a post for someone looking for a “how to” on surfing. But rumps, yup, this is it. As you can see, Jennifer’s figure looks great in a bikini and the curves work well in a wetsuit. Its cold out, but I don’t think that does us much good. Lots of rump to grab here, at least a palm full. Good stuff. Enjoy the bikini pictures.

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Tara Reid never harmed even a fly, she was just wasted.

tara reid, american pie reunion, access hollywood

Tara Reid spoke to Access Hollywood, we would assume about her new movie coming out, American Pie Reunion. Her career has pretty much hinged on the reunion of her famed movie as the script would clearly have to include her, I mean, what’s the option? Casting over her with Lohan? Well, according to Reid, she was never that bad. So essentially, staying above the Lohan media kept her place in a movie she was originally cast in.

via AccessHollywood:
“It’s really important how you keep things private,” she said when asked about her at-times very public past.
“You wanna try to have a good time and try to keep it at home… especially today with the paparazzi, try to control it as much as you can,” she continued.
The actress takes ownership of her public snafus, but also points out that she never got arrested or harmed anyone in the process.
“It was my fault, I did it… [but,] it wasn’t that bad what I did,” she explained. “At the end of the day, I really [just] had fun. I wasn’t doing crimes. I wasn’t getting in trouble like that.”

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