Nude Jessica Alba preggo pics?

Sadly, no.

The Sun
Jessica Alba has no intention of following in the footsteps of Demi Moore, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera and posing naked while pregnant.
Just a week after confirming that she is expecting her first child with boyfriend Cash Warren, it has come to light the 26-year-old beauty has turned down THREE offers of baring all for glossy magazine covers.
A friend says: “Jessica keeps getting phone calls from magazines who want her to pose naked when is about seven months into her pregnancy. They know it will make their magazines sell.
“She had three offers on the first day, but she doesn’t intend to take any of them. She thinks her pregnancy is a personal and private thing.”

What is this world coming to? I mean a nude preggo Jessica is better than no nudes at all. And right now, we are getting no nudes at all. This should be a criminal act. Did I mention that I hate the douchebag that gave her the sex trophy? He gets to see her nude, all the time. I get to see her nude, never. Does that sound fair?

I mean, it is Christmas time, Jessica is apparently a real scrooge. I want to hang the mistletoe this year. With my luck, Rosie O’Donnell will be the one that walks under it. Such is my pathetic life.

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Criss Angel and Pamela Anderson, another magic trick.

Pam, I don’t think you need much help with this request. Your looks and career were gone well before you started flaunting your new “trick” around Vegas. I have a request for Criss, can you please just make both of you dissapear to a world where being washed up and being a total douchebag is quarantined from the rest of the free world?

Criss needs to trick his hair into being cool also, because this weird flop thing is god-awful. I hate magicians. Except Carrot Top, because he is the real deal. And he is more attractive than Pamela at this point.

Jennie Garth is shows off her assets

I always did think she was the hottest 90210er. And now we have her in a drunken stupor at the Beaujolais Nouveau launch. Which is a good thing. Not the launch, the fact that her tits are slung over a table.

Cheers to red wine Jenni, now I know what to order for you when we don’t go on that date I have been dreaming of again. I like how her knees buckle up, true drunken hotty style. I would like to tell the makers of the wine that although I have never tasted it, judging from these pictures, you nailed it!

Speaking of nailing things, check out the rest of Jennie’s pics. I really only saw the first two, that is as far as I made it. What can I say? I am a fast customer.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt in Playboy showing off her size 2?

Jennifer Love is sure making a spectacle out of her size 2 plus ever since the infamous bikini pics hit the interweb. But is she ballsy enough to put her booty where her dress is?

Apparently not according to this snip.

US Magazine reports
Jennifer Love Hewitt is comfortable in her skin but she doesn’t want to bare all in Playboy.
Her rep tells Usmagazine.com, “there was an offer, but she declined.”
A source tells Us terms of the deal weren’t discussed.

Just for the record, I like big butts. So if my vote counts, which it never does, I would say do it Jen Love. Size 2 Plus is making a comeback. Or its just making its way, as I am not sure if it was ever really in, except in England. But the English were probably better looking back then.

By the way, if size 2 plus means you get big tits like Jen is showing off, I am all for it.

Whateva.

jennifer love hewitt red 01 jennifer love hewitt red 02 jennifer love hewitt red 03

Jennie Garth is shows off her assets

I always did think she was the hottest 90210er. And now we have her in a drunken stupor at the Beaujolais Nouveau launch. Which is a good thing. Not the launch, the fact that her tits are slung over a table.

Cheers to red wine Jenni, now I know what to order for you when we don’t go on that date I have been dreaming of again. I like how her knees buckle up, true drunken hotty style. I would like to tell the makers of the wine that although I have never tasted it, judging from these pictures, you nailed it!

Speaking of nailing things, check out the rest of Jennie’s pics. I really only saw the first two, that is as far as I made it. What can I say? I am a fast customer.

jennie garth cleavage 01 jennie garth cleavage 02 jennie garth cleavage 03 jennie garth cleavage 04 jennie garth cleavage 05 jennie garth cleavage 06

Jennifer Love Hewitt in Playboy showing off her size 2?

Jennifer Love is sure making a spectacle out of her size 2 plus ever since the infamous bikini pics hit the interweb. But is she ballsy enough to put her booty where her dress is?

Apparently not according to this snip.

US Magazine reports
Jennifer Love Hewitt is comfortable in her skin but she doesn’t want to bare all in Playboy.
Her rep tells Usmagazine.com, “there was an offer, but she declined.”
A source tells Us terms of the deal weren’t discussed.

Just for the record, I like big butts. So if my vote counts, which it never does, I would say do it Jen Love. Size 2 Plus is making a comeback. Or its just making its way, as I am not sure if it was ever really in, except in England. But the English were probably better looking back then.

By the way, if size 2 plus means you get big tits like Jen is showing off, I am all for it.

Whateva.

jennifer love hewitt red 01 jennifer love hewitt red 02 jennifer love hewitt red 03

Hillary Clinton on campaign trail with Billary.

In news of the NOT HOT, lets talk about women in politics.

Ok, that wasn’t fun.

Lets talk about Bill. Honestly, I think Billary is way better looking than Hillary. I am not gay, I am just honest. I think Hillary has more manly qualities than Billary, making Billary more feminine.

Her coat and hairstyle are both more manly than Billary’s shirt and hair. Insanely True.

Jamie Lynn Spears caught hanging out with her parenting coach.

Otherwise known as her mother. Apaprently Lynne Spears new book about parenting is on hold because, pretty much, she blows as a mother. I mean, look around, are there worse kids? I think kids in the Watts District that grow up and join gangs are probably more civilized to some degree. Worse more, Lynn Spears apparently sold the story of Jamie Lynn’s pregnancy to OK! Magazine. If there were an award for being classy, Lynne Spears would be in the running.

Not.

And what is wrong with mommy Spear’s breast? No, not Jamie, Jamie’s mom. Wow, never realized how confusing this could get. Look at them, they are really sagging. It must be from stress. Surely she has Dr. 90210’s digits in her Fav 5. Get those puppies fixed.

Scarlett Johansson is fine.

After seeing Katie Holmes yesterday, it is with great pleasure to you that I present a thriving example of a woman that said no to Cruisentology. Check out Scarlette in the Belgian edition of Elle magazine, looking classically hotter than ever. She is elegant, soft, gorgeous and most importantly, not a Cruisentologist. Back in 2005, Cruise invited the bundle of elegance over to a Scientology dinner. She thought she going to discuss Mission Impossible 2.

She kindly excused herself and went on to stay hot. Katie Holmes is now ugly. Getting the picture? If not, check out these pictures for yourself. I would love to have some nudes, but I don’t, so deal.

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Megan Fox holds international breast conference.

I don’t think the conference had anything to do with breast cancer or any other such breastly philanthropic cause, but it sure as heck did cause some Japanese people to put down their Helios for a couple of seconds and take a look at the newstands. Megan did a little teaser-topless shoot for the Japanese version of Rolling Stone. The pictures bleed of hotness.

I especially love lust the one that has her crouched on her knees slightly folded like a rare black panther. Meow. The leather pants painted on her bottom and legs is just over the top.

I think I am in love. Or lust. Or just part of some perverted fantasy festival in my head. Call me Megan. I want to date you, sleep with you, then dump you for some random bar girl.

I am that into you.
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